Please excuse the overly-emotional title. The angsty title, even. But consider for a brief bit that I'm posting onto blogger, or formally blogspot, and not onto wordpress. Does that make any sense? Wordpress seems so much more refined and renowned. Blogspot, instead, takes a corner seat in the cafeteria and eats by themselves. Wow, I must be feeling really Jr. High today. Okay, let me try to pull this back.
I thought that my talent would warrant me at least a glimmer of recognition during this first week of NYU classes. I thought that I'd have new friends texting my phone so much it'd vibrate for minutes on end. I thought, that at least, I'd feel like I belonged. But, as noted before, I'm posting now on blogger. NYU Local rejected my application. That's not even this school's official newspaper! It's their fucking blog! And I wanted to write for that fucking blog! My writing isn't up to par, boom, roasted.
Earlier this year, around June, I submitted a film I made in my Senior Year of high school to the "All American High School Film Festival." The even is huge, and first annual. Which means that not only was it my first chance to submit to that festival, it'd also be my last. I submitted my film, proud and excited, and also uploaded it onto YT so that my FB and Twitter friend/followers/acquaintances could watch it. After some positive feedback, I was feeling pretty great! A future NYU classmate even asked me which festival it was, he'd liked my film and was wondering where he could find more content such as it, maybe submit one of his films too. I sent him the link to the festival. Two days ago the selections were announced. His film was chosen and mine was not. My filmmaking is not up to par, boom, roasted.
And now I sit here, in the basement of Third North Residence Hall, waiting for my laundry to finish drying, looking over all the books I have to buy, typing out this blog post, rummaging through my insecurities and realizing that no one ever will read them. If anyone does, let me know if I used too many commas. Fuck it, just tell me how to do this better.
Thanks a bunch.
- David
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